My Selfish Poem

Lex, I hope this poem doesn't make you feel guilty. That is not its intention. I wrote it the day you flew back to Germany. Not only did you leaving mean one less body in the house but it also meant the holidays were over and I was left to figure out what to do with my life as an unemployed-living-at-home-college-graduate. A big transition all around. I titled it My Selfish Poem because in it I talk about wanting you to come home. But I hope you will take it more as an I-miss-you poem. Of course I would love to see you more, but I also support you carving your own path, exploring, and finding happiness wherever that may be.

So here it is:

My Selfish Poem

Dear Sis,

Don’t fall in love and leave me here behind
In the place you once called home
Because it is lonely here without you
And without you not really home.

Without you there’s an empty room
That is far too neat and bare with gloom
Without you there’s no kitchen muse
To whip up vegetable menus
Without you my paints run dry
My shading looks flat to the eye
Without you no needles click
As the family gathers to watch Netfilx
Without you there’s no silly exercise
Lunging around Sonia, getting sore thighs
Without you tennis matches are less fun
Fewer crossword puzzles get done

This is my selfish poem
Because I am not blind to see
How the life you’ve built across the globe
Makes you so happy

And I know we grow old and we have to move on
All birds must fly from their nest
And they migrate down south and start a new life
Returning home only for a short rest
But selfish me wants you to come back
To the place you once called home
Because it is lonely here without you
And without you not really home.